Rant: Being groped at Airports - When security has gone too far..

I just watched a news piece about complaints in America about over-invasive airport security. Here are some thoughts I bashed out - Feilidh.

A topic which really fires me up is the surrendering of privacy and liberty for the gain of security.

The question is: Should the public forgo their rights to privacy and liberty in order to be more safe (allegedly)? 

I try not to be alarmist when it comes to this issue because I do not consider Western Society to be an Orwellian or police state.

I do however think people sacrifice their liberties far too easily. I once argued with a middle aged workmate who saw no problem with putting security cameras in every corner of a city. "You've got nothing to worry about if you've got nothing to hide" - she said adamantly. I find this line of thinking extremely worrying.

One issue that arises in the security vs privacy debate is people's treatment at airport checkpoints.
I've travelled to airports around the world and been subject to most security protocols. I've had my brand new sunscreen confiscated (I was mega pissed) as I was leaving Auckland International and in Melbourne I had a snarly she-devil tell me in a very condescending tone to walk through the scanner again because I had my hands in my pocket.

But these are not really bad experiences. I've never had someone security officer pat down near my johnson or been subject to a 'random' bomb search.

Being at airports is one of the few times I feel like a caged animal. Entering into an airport means you submit to being scrutinised, cast under a suspicious gaze, photographed, scanned and ordered around. It sucks.

America - never a country to do things by halves has taken invasiveness to a whole new level. When going to a terminal in the USA you have the glorious options of either A: Having a full body scan where an attendant can see you naked (although the image is inverted) or B: Getting a full body pat down by the TSA in which the areas around your bust and groin are prodded (just in case you've got your underwear crammed full of grenades).

John Pistole, the Transportation Security Administration (TSA) chief said while addressing the public's growing frustration with the procedures; that those unwilling to submit to screening would relinquish their right to fly. 


Some people clearly don't mind being scanned, prodded etc because for them, the measures give them peace of mind. But how far would those people let security measures go before they felt personal boundaries were being crossed? A cavity search? 

I understand that governments have to be seen to take security seriously but surely this is too far.

 There is clearly some need to be vigilant against attacks on planes but do we let a few party crashers ruin parties world wide?

I think blanket bans of anything because of a few idiots are always unfair. It's penalising the majority for the actions of a few. Some people blow their faces off with fireworks on guyfawks. The result? Total ban on fireworks. Then no one gets fireworks anymore. That is bullshit. 

One might argue that invasive security will help stop planes from being blown out of the sky. Let's be careful for sure but security measures need to be put into perspective.

The media can warp people's perception of the likelihood of any given event happening. If you bought into media hype surrounding shark attacks you would probably think at least hundreds of people were killed every year by sharks. The reality? Around five people die every year from shark attacks.

The same holds for terrorism. The risk is WAAAAYYYY overstated.

Here's an abridged exert from an article "Don't Be Terrorised" by Reason Magazine:

Michael Rothschild, a former business professor at the University of Wisconsin, worked out a couple of plausible scenarios for terrorist attacks in order to calculate the risk to the public. Even if terrorists were able to pull off one attack per year on the scale of the September 11th, that would mean your one-year risk would be one in 100,000 and your lifetime risk would be about one in 1300. In other words, your risk of dying in a plausible terrorist attack is much lower than your risk of dying in a car accident, by walking across the street, by drowning, in a fire, by falling, or by being murdered.

I think a fantastic quote that all those scared of terrorism should take note of is the following by Benjamin Franklin: "Those who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety."

Safety and security are important, yes. But so is living and moving freely from place to place and not being treated as if you are already a criminal by your government.

Feedback is always welcome..

Puuurrrfff (Thoughts about living in Perth)

The highly annoying Australian Little Crow

Having only lived in Perth for a couple of months, I can't claim to be an absolute expert on the area. Nevertheless here are some factoids and observations about Perth.

Perth:

* It's dry and hot, has population of 1.6 million and is the most isolated and sunniest capital city in the world. Located in Western Australia, Australia's richest state.

*It has heaps of Universities. Auckland, which is is a similar size (1.4 million), has two Universities. Perth has five.

*A very rich place, wealth is evident everywhere. The average house size is enormous.

*Perth has the highest concentration of self-made millionaires in the world.

*Fucking swearing.. I don't think this is particular to Perth but I have encountered a lot of f-bombs here. A manager at one of my jobs said the following, nearly verbatim:"I can't fuckin go selling this fuckin baby food to the fuckin babies cause the fuckin mothers will be going: 'You've fuckin poisoned my fuckin babies!'" This is at the extreme end of the scale but in general I think ozzies curse more than other cultures.

*Many British, South African and Asian Immigrants have chosen Perth as their home.

*Most of the city is near Swan River and it has some beautiful scenery. Also a lot of nice beaches.

*The preferred sport of the state in Aussie Rules (which I still don't get). Rugby and league play second fiddle but cricket is popular too.

*It's safe, peaceful and clean but a tad light on things to do.

*The club and restaurant scene seem good but not a whole lot of stuff to lure tourists here(in my view).

*When it's hot - it's stinking hot. Sometimes it's 20 degrees in the middle of the night. I have to drink a lot more water than I do in my hometown. 

*Flies - They drive me to the verge of insanity sometimes. They land on your face or in your ears forcing you to do an obligatory hand wave to get rid of them, but it's only a momentary reprieve before they land again.. Not many people walk the footpaths, except in the city.

*Crows - In movies, they are used as a foreboding symbol of peril. The "little crow" variety has an evil look about them but they don't make a "cawww" noise. It's more like a frog vomiting, if I had to imagine what it would sound like.

*Most people I've met here have been friendly.

*Freemantle - Gorgeous place, very artsy. Nice beaches and markets and a vibrant music scene. Only takes about 25 minutes to drive to from the central city

*Very few places accept eftpos for transactions under 10 dollars, which means you have to find an ATM for your bank before you can buy stuff.

*A lot of shops and banks close at 4pm on weekdays! Many shops are closed on Sunday.

*All police carry tasers, better than guns but kind of imposing.

*Food is much more expensive than in NZ, so is alcohol. Petrol is cheaper.

*Western Australia has no Warrant of Fitness scheme for cars meaning there are a few scrap heaps on the road that wouldn't be road legal in other countries.

*Perth is sprawling - it takes a while to get from one place to another.

*Has patches of greenery but not particularly lush. Average rainfall per year in Perth is low about 400 mm.

*Mining is the big thing in this state. It's one of the reasons the Australian economy continues to perform strongly while economies around the world crumble.  Many students at Perth Uni's do degrees in engineering or qualifications that are in some way related to the mining and oil/gas industries.

*Perth is the only Australian state to have a Liberal Government. The rest are Labor.

*There are no daylights savings here (they trialled it for three years, took a vote and decided not to have it). As such it gets sunny at about five in the morning and dark in the early evening.

*You can become obscenely wealthy if you get a job in the mining industry but it's difficult to crack into. A lot of people do fly in/fly out missions where they'll work solidly in a remote area for a week of 12 or more hour days, then fly home for a week.

*Wages are generally much higher in Australia than NZ. Minimum wage is about $18 an hour AUD but nearly everyone gets more than that. Tax rate is also lower than NZ.

*The Perth accent isn't as strong as other parts of Australia, especially when compared to Brisbane.

Hope these thoughts were interesting to you. Comments and questions welcome

Premature speculation about why it makes perfect sense to leave New Zealand

The much abused phrase "brain drain" finally makes sense to me.

For so many years New Zealand politicians such as Don Brash have bandied about the term with gusto. "We must stop the loss of our educated young!" they would cry.

While still at High School, I read seriously worded editorials in the Listener about skills shortages and incentives to keep the educated young in NZ and I would think, even with better wages, why are so many people leaving?

I can now tentatively say that I have joined the ranks of young kiwis that have decided to live abroad.

I've traveled a lot of Australia - from the East to West Coast and up to the Northern Territories. I have a good idea of what the country looks and feels like and although there are some crucial cultural and historical differences between NZ and OZ (and our accents of course) on a day-to-day basis, they are very similar.

According to an NZ emigration website I googled, there are close to 500,000 New Zealander's living and working in Australia! In 2001, there were eight times as many kiwis in Australia than vice versa.. Hmmmm, what's going on here?

I was already well aware that wages in OZ are higher but people in NZ would say: "But the living cost is much higher as well." So far, that doesn't correspond with my experience.

Moving here made 100 per cent sense the other day as I found out the wages some of the jobs get here.

The wages in Perth - to stack shelves at a supermarket are $20 Australian an hour. Australians get penal rates on weekends and less tax. Comparatively, retail workers in NZ tend to get paid around the $13 NZ mark. You are taxed more and unless you work in certain sectors you wont get extra on the weekends.

I was already well aware that wages in OZ are higher but people in NZ would say: "But the living cost is much higher as well." So far, that doesn't correspond with my experience. The cost of living in Perth is very similar to living in Auckland or Wellington, perhaps slightly higher. A room in Perth goes for between 130-170 AUD and food is almost identical.

How much do you suppose a junior journalist working for a community Newspaper in Perth earns? - $25 an hour. That's about 10 dollars an hour more than NZ when you factor in the exchange rate. With such an incredible disparity in wages, even when you factor in living costs, it's no wonder NZ can't keep it's young.

In Perth - wealth is very evident. It's a very clean, modern city with a population of about 1.6 million. I haven't spotted many shitty houses so far but then I haven't been to all the suburbs yet.

Western Australia is a mining area and the mines are ridiculous cash-cows. I've heard of guys getting paid well over $100,000 a year to drive trucks and even cleaners and cooks make close to the 100k mark. My conclusion: minerals (Australia) beat agriculture (New Zealand) in the economic stakes with a great big stick.

I'm not a particularly money-centric guy but in a pure economic sense - earning far more money to work in the same job, in a similar country which doesn't require you to have a visa - makes sense.

I wont be here for long. I plan to earn-save and leave, spreading my wings to the Northern Hemisphere.

I, like many NZr's have a nearly $20,0000 loan, which is low for four years of study. If I earn Australian dollars ($1 AUD currently gets 1.30 NZD)I can pay off my loan a hell of a lot quicker.

Getting away from your home country (wherever it is) is a great way to get a new perspective. Just being exposed to people with different goals, values and idea is a wonderful eye opener.

So far the only NZ stories I've heard are about the Commonwealth Games and Paul Henry saying stupid shit (which is typical).

On February 6th this year, at the Waitangi day celebrations at New Zealand embassy in Jakarta I met a 33 year old New Zealand guy called Kevin. Kevin had been away from New Zealand for just over ten years, living and working first in Hong Kong then Jakarta.

He said that Kiwi's had a "boomerang" culture. We go abroad for a couple of years and then are eventually drawn back to settle down.

With all this being said, I do think NZ has a lot to offer and I'm not advocating a permanent move abroad. It's just - for many, when it's so easy to shack up in Australia and get paid a shit-load more for doing the exact same job as in NZ, why wouldn't they?

Money isn't everything and certainly not the only reason NZr's should explore the world. It is persuasive however.

I just checked the Big Mac Index - which is the economists yearly gauge of each countries purchasing price parity - that is, how much bang they get for their buck. In NZ and Australia it takes just 14 minutes of average work to earn yourself a Big Mac, in Jakarta it takes 136. So both NZ and OZ have a lot to be grateful for.

Wealth in this world certainly hasn't been divided out fairly.

I do believe that NZ is a boomerang culture - I'm not going to be gone forever - but I will be abroad with the other roughly 650,000 kiwis for some time yet.

A very inspiring man I met in Cambodia.

Today I had a very humbling experience.

In Siem Reap I met up with a lovely local man in his early thirties named Rady who had just started a free school for disadvantaged children.

We got in contact through Couchsurfing and he came and picked me up from my hostel. We drove about five kilometres on the back of his scooter along a highway that was flanked with lush rice paddies.

We got to the school grounds and over 200 children ages 4-16 were scattered around the grounds either playing or in the humble classrooms waiting for the start of class. There were not enough chairs for all the kids, so some had to sit on the dirt floor for lessons.

Rady had made the school possible through his own determination and hard work.

He owns some land and plans to gradually expand build more classrooms(there are currently about four), so that children who are missing out in the public school system can come, be educated and learn English.

He told me that at the public schools, some families are unable to afford the costs of stationary and uniforms. He also said the wages of teachers at public schools were so meagre that the quality of the teaching was often lacking. If a Cambodian parent wants their child to get a top education, they have to seek out expensive international schools.

A class full of 11 year olds were happy to see me. I tried to explain to them, with lots of gesticulating and Rady translating, where New Zealand was, what the kiwi is and that I worked as a journalist. They asked me some questions and we snapped some pics.

A volunteer teacher from the UK who had taken a term off to teach English in Cambodia told me that some of the children's parents could barely afford clothing. Rady also said many of the children had lost their parents.

Looking at these children, smiling and hopeful and relatively worry free, I thought that whatever misfortunes have befallen me in my life, I have nothing that could compare to the situation of these kids. Even the worst off in NZ can still go to school. I felt grateful for all the opportunities and benefits that being born in New Zealand had afforded me.

Western society, with its trappings of opulence, can often make us forget that most of the world have it a lot tougher than us.

Cambodia is one of the poorest countries in Asia. The United Nations Development Program's 2009 Human Development Index ranks Cambodia 137 out of 182 countries in terms of quality of life.

In a country such as this a little money can go a long way. It takes less than a week on New Zealand's minimum wage to earn enough money send a teenager in Cambodia to University for a year. However, when the average Khmer earns only a few dollars a day, that's a hell of a lot.

Rady showed me a pond where he had 2000 fish that would be sold to market when they reach the right size in order to help fund the school. After two months, the school was are already struggling with running costs and Rady said he would sell his laptop and lobby his contacts to help his raise funds.

The government had so far refused him assistance apparently believing Rady was trying to profit from the school.

Rady could relate to the poverty that many of the children at his school faced. As a boy he had to climb and pick coconuts from the tall trees to make enough money to go to school. His highschool was 10 kilometres away so he had to save for many months to afford the 25 dollars to buy a bicycle to get him there and home. He earned English at an academy and studied tourism for four years then IT for a year.

He told me he wanted to give the children hope for a better future but that he may struggle to do so if he doesn't recieve more money. What a brilliant guy!

Recently, I felt very hard done by, having lost a significant amount of money during my travels. I can clear my head of that now.

Rady is doing his all to assist those in need. He has no financial incentive, he just wants to help.

I think everyone can learn a lot from a guy like him.

Advice for negotiating some of the world's craziest roads

Negotiating your way around the highways of a foreign land can be an intimidating experience for the uninitiated.

To take a leap from the comparatively deserted roads of New Zealand (especially Dunedin where it takes less to half an hour to drive nearly anywhere in the city limits) to some of the busiest roads in the world takes some adjusting.

I've been fortunate enough (or unfortunate, depending on your view) to drive in both Jakarta and Bangkok, which are two of the busiest cities in the world. I haven't driven in India or China which I hear can be quite perilous as well.

What follows are some observations and tips which will hopefully see you right when you hop onto a scooter/motorbike/rental vehicle of some description in said countries. I won't claim to be an absolute expert on the matter but I didn't crash in either place which must count for something, right?

I should note that I actually had a lot of fun driving in both of these places. You have to keep your wits about you though, because the roads are quite different to the West.

*In Bangkok, during rush hour the public transport such as the free public buses, the MRT and the Subway are the best option to avoid driving and getting caught in gridlocked traffic.

*In Jakarta, the public transport system is seriously lacking, and the footpaths are mostly terrible and sometimes non existent. So have a crack at driving yourself - expect a lot of traffic though.

*Direction:
In Indonesia and Thailand they drive on the left side of the road and the steering wheels are on the right, just like in Australia and New Zealand, so no problems there. In other parts of Asia they drive on the right.

*Licenses:
Technically you should get an international driver's license before driving away from your home country but I didn't. In Phuket a cop stopped me on a scooter and seemed to accept my New Zealand driver's license. I've heard of people being harangued by police in Bali for bribes from minor infractions so I guess there is no solid rule.

*Traffic:
There are a shit load more cars on the road. Like ten times as many. This means more traffic and generally more frustration. Bring a book for those long journeys (such as the trip to the supermarket around the corner). Scooters are good cause you can weave around cars a lot of the time and save yourself time. Just don't fall off.

*Air conditioning:
It's a must in hot climates. Make sure to close the vents inside your car or you will be breathing in a lot of exhaust from the car in front of you.

Lack of indication:
Generally, indicators are underused. Often a car will begin merging with little warning so be super vigilant.

Motorbikes and scooters:
They are everywhere.. Especially in Jakarta. Check your mirrors because often a guy, or a whole family may be just centimetres from your vehicle.

Sudden stopping, overuse of hazard lights:
In Bangkok, a lot of taxis seem to just stop in lanes of traffic, put on their hazard lights and pick up or drop off people (a lot of the roads don't have an area to pull over, just high curbs). This creates traffic buildup and eventually cars start weaving around the stopped vehicle and into other lanes of traffic. This is a prime spot for accidents so be careful.

Aggression:
Don't expect people to give way. After a couple of weeks of driving you'll understand why. When people spend approximately ten times longer in traffic than they'd like; they become a bit frustrated. They are not prone to letting others in front of them because there are so many damn cars around. It's like opening the flood gates. Being considerate is great, but expect to be taken advantage of.
After a few weeks in Jakarta I was opportunistically cutting people off like everyone else. Why? Because it seems you could die waiting an intersection waiting for someone to let you in.

Driving the wrong way up a road:
This is common. Especially for motor bikers, they will usually stick to the very far right side of the road coming towards you. Again, stay alert.

Safety, or lack thereof:
You will see many things on South East Asia Roads that would make a safety minded bureaucrat run for the hills. Backs of pickup trucks crammed with workers, scooters overloaded with families, people texting while driving, children who are clearly too young to have gotten their licenses with no helmets, giant trucks or vehicles with loads that are so precariously balanced that look like they may fall off at any moment. Get used to it. The police do their job, sometimes. I hear that they are grossly underpaid and as a result corruption is rampant.

Speed:
Some places have speed limits, others do not. In reality, there is so much traffic in most places you'd be happy doing 40 kph.

In sum, it is quite a transition from a quiet, regulated Western road to a big, pulsating mass of traffic and frequent bad driving (I am not implying there's not plenty of bad driving in the West by the way).
BUT, it can be fun driving in Asia and you should give it a go if you can.
I would not suggest driving during peak hour traffic because that it would more accurately be described as sitting stationary in your vehicle with the engine running. It can take literally hours to drive a couple of kilometers during peak hour. At those times, best to grab a tuk tuk or ojek - have fun!

If anybody actually reads this, I would be interested to read about your driving experiences abroad....

Some thoughts on living in Indonesia

I wrote this just after I returned from Indonesia in February... I was there for nearly two months. Makasih banyak untuk membacar ini.


Indonesia is one of the most populated countries in the world and the region with the most Muslims, and yet it's a place that I think few people in the West know much about.

The chance to travel and discover a new culture is something that I always jump upon so when the opportunity to go on a journalism practicum in Jakarta came up, I went for it.

The impression one would get from the media was that Indonesia was full of danger, terrorism or environmental disasters. While these things were relevant issues they are far from the full picture. I felt safe and welcome during my entire two month trip.

My friend and I arrived at Soekarno-Hatta International at the end of 2009 with open minds but little idea of what Jakarta would be like. Our pre-departure guide went into great detail about things to be aware of but was light on photos.

As we walked from the plane towards the customs area of the airport we were greeted with the cheerful sign warning us that drug trafficking was punishable by death.

Two friendly girls from the University we were to attend greeted us at the airport and instructed us about how much money we would need for the first few days. One of them advised me that 250,000 Indonesian Rupiah (about 27 USD) should get us through the next few days. I was dumbfounded.

The taxi driver back to our Kos (accommodation) introduced us to the chaos that is Jakarta traffic (in Indonesian "macet"). He flashed his lights and honked his horn with gusto. Motorbikes weaved within centimetres of the car and an assortment of vehicles from the very flash to the should-be-banned-from-the-road filled the jam-packed highways. The noise was incredible. (I was to learn that even a short journey by taxi can take thirty minutes).

As the taxi approached came the city I was surprised by the immediate contrasts. We passed by densely populated areas of rusting, corrugated iron houses surrounded by rubbish that were just metres away from luxury highrise buildings.

To get to my kos we travelled down an extremely narrow streets lined with vendors selling fruit, cellphone credit and nearby there were performing monkeys (topeng monyet) that were cruelly beaten into wearing masks and performing tricks. My kos had a large security gate but as one of the young guards pulled it open and let us in he gave us a big smile. The hospitality from the locals was amazing.

A group of about 10 New Zealander's and Australians including myself, walked from our kos to uni each day. During this walk locals would often wave, stare and ask; "How are you Mr?" Being one of the few white faces in the city was an experience because you are the focus of so much attention.

Some people asked for photos with me and would enthustically say "bule" (the exact definition is in dispute but it ranges from "foreigner" to "whitey" to "albino").
Getting across the major roads is a daunting challenge. There are few crossings and the ones that do exist are usually ignored by cars. Generally, you just raise your hand and walk out onto the extremely busy roads. Cars will usually wait for you and motorbikes will weave around you.

In a country where the minimum wage is about 110 USD a month, a person with a modest income from the West can live very well. A decent meal costs between three and six dollars and warung's (street vendors) are even cheaper.

It can be tough seeing the suffering that some of the people living in Jakarta endure. Many of the luxuries that we take for granted in the West are made possible because poor countries like Indonesia have factories that produce goods for poverty wages. Outside of the luxury super malls that Jakarta has so many of, there are often young children holding umbrellas to walk you through the rain for 20 cents or beggars, missing teeth or limbs sitting looking desolate with their arms outstretched.

While I already aware of these problems, seeing the desperation of these people for myself made it more personal and real.

There was a resilience and inherent friendliness from many of the locals who have so little but are so generous which I found touching. On many occasions where I found myself lost, I would have no problem finding someone to help me out.

A big cultural difference from the West was the Muslim religion. Going into shopping malls and walking past rooms full of people kneeling in prayer was not something I was used to. Similarly, at the designated times throughout the day, the sad wailings of the mosques would blare from the loudspeakers which was both beautiful at times and occasionally trying (especially at 5 am in the morning).

Learning the language at a local University was a fantastic introduction to the country because I got the chance to interact with locals my own age who had as much curiousity about me and my culture as I did about theirs.

Jakarta is a place that often gets a bad wrap from travellers but it has great spots to hang out if you know where to go. I was very lucky to become friends with students from Atma Jaya University, some tourism ambassadors for the city and to stay with Indonesians in different parts of the country. I also became close with the family of the woman I was seeing there and being welcomed into their family gave me an insight into a completely different way of life.

Aside from Jakarta I travelled right through Java and Bali but I really only scraped the surface.

Indonesia is not a place that is easy to summarise because there is literally so much happening at any one time. As an emerging democracy and a country that just 12 years ago, was controlled by a dictator there are many issues they have yet to tackle. From corruption, to poverty, to environemtal degradation, public transport - the list goes on. But for all of that - the country, the people are beautiful and fantastic and it was an unforgetable and character building experience. I highly recommend a visit!

Aku cinta Indonesia sangat banyak dan akan segera kembali ke sana lagi

Being realistic..

After a great journey around the country I'm back to the familiarity of home.

Now that it's been more than five weeks since I resigned, I don't regret the decision to leave but I don't feel closer to making a decision about what I want to be doing (I guess there is no great hurry, right?)


A few years ago when I was considering career possibilities I basically ruled out everything I didn't wanna do and sorted through what was left. The past year and a half I was building up to starting a job that I wasn't sure I wanted and as it turned out, I didn't.

The other day I watched a fantastic youtube compilation of stuff Will Smith had said during interviews throughout his career.

Whatever you make of the guy's acting or music, he has come from the stereotypical working class background and through hard work and the right opportunities has become phenomenally successful as both an actor and musiciain. Check it out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OLN2k0b3g70.

One of his memorable quotes was that "being realistic is the most commonly travelled road to mediocrity." I think that's exactly right. Mediocrity is not necessarily a bad thing, it just depends on how ambitious you are and what sort of life you wish to lead.

It got me thinking, do you have to accept that you will work a job you don't really like because it's the easiest and most societally accepted path? People who dare to dream are often shot down as unrealistic - sometimes they are.
But it those who push the boundaries of possibility that expand human knowledge and help us better understand the Universe we inhabit.

They say necessity is the mother of invention so it's probably good advice to take a job when you can, especially when there are not many on offer. However, I want to hold onto the idea that a satisfying career where I can contribute to humanity and live my passion is out there.

As an atheist, I believe the only life I'll ever have is the one I'm living right now. It makes me very wary of wasting time. What I'd hate more than anything is reflecting back on my years and thinking of the things I wish I had done.

At a certain point, holding out for that perfect opportunity or partner or whatever it is will be challenged by the realities of life. I think a good attitude to possess is not to think, "I can't" but instead "how can I?"

Navel gazing and career path

The exploding head sums it up -

I am at a massive transitional stage of my life in terms of career, purpose and so on.

In the last three weeks, I have resigned from my journalism job after just two months when it was meant to last two years. Leaving a secure job in a tight employment market? I must be crazy!

In a week I'll leave my nice Auckland flat and my cool flatties to return home to decide which direction to pursue.

In the grand scheme of the universe what's happening to me is completely banal and unimportant but at this particular moment it feels like big stuff.

Should you care? No, probably not - there are far more important things to be concerned about than my life-trajectory angst.

BUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am going through the same thoughts and doubts that many of us go through, so my hope is that you can identify, relate and perhaps give suggestions!

In the next few weeks I want to focus my energy on something new, something that I feel passionate about. I want to find a job that I love and that I feel actually matters.

My journey to this particular moment started at the beginning of 2008 when I dropped out of law school and finished my arts degree in politics and film. I applied and was selected as an intern for a major media company and got entry to Canterbury journalism school which started in 2009.

After traveling for two months over summer I returned to Auckland in March and optimistically started my two year contract.

I had a gut feeling during my placement last year that the work environment wasn't for me but I thought I should see the process through.

Parts of the job were good, and I did meet some great folks. I tried my best and wrote some big stories but I was already dragging my feet to work. One of my colleagues made the decision to leave a lot easier with his behaviour (long story).

I think many people have the feeling they are not on the right path in life but they stay at it cause they feel they should or because they have to provide for their families. For some people work is just a way of making money and the boring bit that you have to go through to do fun stuff.

In 2005, during a commencement address to Stanford University, Steve Jobs used a quote that I think is very powerful and I wholeheartedly intend to live by:

"Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure - these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart."

People who excel in a certain fields usually have a mix of talent and raw passion. I know what my interests are and want to throw myself into something that feels important. Too idealistic? Probably

For the moment though, I'm reading, learning and surveying options.

They range from finding another job, doing further study or taking a big round the world trip. I have to say at this moment, the third option is most appealing.

Thoughts or comments welcome..